God, I've been loathing this moment. This is one of those albums that I'm supposed to like because I'm weird and I like weird things, and this is a landmark album in the history of weirdness.
I've tried with this album, I really have. Multiple times .Every time I put it on, I want nothing so much as for it to end. This album is the equivalent to a person who confuses having an unusual pet for having a personality. "I'm glad you were able to buy a kimono dragon, Captain Beefheart. Can I get the fuck out of here now?"
If I'm being serious, I can see why people were influenced by this album. There's little bits and pieces of things that would become much more prominent in music in the decades to follow. That's my problem with it, though. It's all just bits and pieces of things, with no actual coherent expression of a whole idea. Every time I find something that I like, it ends quickly, and moves on to something else that is the musical analogy of someone putting their finger and inch from your face and saying "I'm not touching you"
Anyway, I've been dreading this moment. I'm going to give this album a bad grade because I don't like it, but I have to actually listen to it to see how bad of a grade it will be. And, of course, it's a double album because they couldn't shovel this much garbage onto just one disk.
I feel the same way about this album that I feel about all of David Lynch's movies. I know that I'm supposed to like it. Tons of people whose opinions I really respect love this album and think it's brilliant (also, it's David Lynch's favorite album because of course it is). However, when I listen to it, I don't enjoy it, and then I feel stupid because I'm supposed to enjoy it, and maybe I'm just too stupid to understand it. Fuck you, Captain Beefheart. I'm not stupid, you are. If you're so much smarter than me, how come I'm alive and you're dead?
2/5 This album has an incredible legacy, but so does Michael Jackson's dad. Legacy isn't everything