Venus Luxure No. 1 Baby

I’m at a 1.5 that I’ll bump down to a 1. This is the first time I’ve given a 1 since we got “Haut de gamme” 783 albums ago.

I would like to make this clear: this is not the worst album we’ve gotten. It will continue to be “Haut de gamme”. Honestly, on a nicer day, I may have given this a 2 just for trying to exist. Today is not that day. Today is where I put my foot down and finally give something a 1. I found that absolutely nothing in this album hooked me in. I think there’s a singular kind of OK song in “Let Me Come Back”, which I only sort of halfway liked for just kinda being dumb, in a “crummy PS2 destruction derby game” sort of way. There’s some variant of that energy that exists for most of this album. The reason I’m at a 1.5 is because there is some amount of instrumental prowess here that occasionally dips into something resembling fun. It’s got some energy to it that doesn’t leave it completely devoid of life. The problem, of course, is that when you stop having fun with a janky PS2 game, there’s no value in it anymore. You’ve exhausted the stupidity & you’re left with a physical representation of wasted time. When this album exhausts its sense of fun, it no longer feels appealing to listen to.

This album felt like a waste of time. I can admit that there’s something loosely appealing here, in a “what if you need background noise grunge rock that goes nowhere” sort of way, or if you really, really, really couldn’t afford or find a Fugazi CD for some reason. I gave Fugazi a 5, by the way. I like this style when it’s done well. This is not done well. This is poorly mixed, poorly written, & poorly sung. Every instrumental clashes against each other in the mix in a way that muddles all the drums & guitars into each other. There’s not a single lyric here that makes any cohesive sense, especially as they related to the song titles. “Seven Seas” has some weird lines about good things shaking like leaves & nobody acknowledging him, and absolutely none of it has to do with so much as a drop of water.

Scott McCloud feels like the physical manifestation of a poorly made AI Kurt Cobain, down to his voice. It’s perhaps more impressive by the fact that this is 1993. Many other bands took great things from Nirvana & the Seattle grunge scene. Girls Against Boys, born in a different Washington (D.C.), clearly took the opposite lessons. You can barely hear him throughout this album. The jury is out on whether that’s a bad thing or not, given the state of the lyrics here. When you can hear him, it truly does sound like someone who heard Kurt Cobain on a static-y radio & decided he was going to sing like that. I have no idea what the fuck he’s saying half the time, obviously compounded by the fact that he’s just saying whatever the fuck these lyrics are half the time.

At one point, he claims “like candy, this baby's bone dry”. Candy is not bone dry. If you’ve ever had bone dry candy, I highly suggest you sue someone. Among other claims in this album, he writes that “you’re good like lucky”, “babies are blue”, there’s such a thing as a “new wet heart attack”, & at the end, he claims “they gonna take me from the bug house”. I don’t know what any of this means. He also includes the line “I'm just not on drugs right now”, and I simply can’t imagine that to be true.

I really truly do not want to give this a 1. I looked for any possible hook to bump it up, but I just can’t find one that I can argue in good faith. This is 46 minutes of mostly the same track, & then, in classic post-hardcore fashion, tries to do something slightly different at the end to show their range. I found “Bughouse” to be incomprehensible, akin to the rant in Billy Madison. The only point I can give is the final line of this album being “I’m out of tune”. I think it’s a poor finale to an album generally full of poor tracks with a consistently low ceiling of “that was fine, I guess”.

It’s frustrating because there are always moments where the instrumentation hits a nice stride, providing a glimmer of hope for a good melody or something bigger to latch onto. It’s the hope that’s giving this album a 1.5. It’s false hope. It never truly comes. At the end of the day, it feels like an album devoid of character, and ultimately, a truly poor album experience. I tried to go down to Scott’s level. I couldn’t speak to him, and this album never spoke to me. I think it’s baffling that this album made the list at all, frankly. It's not something you need to listen to before you die. Hence, a 1.5 that I’ll bump down to a 1.

I’m pleading to the randomizer: please give us something fantastic tomorrow.

This is one of those albums that if you hear a song pop up somewhere like a snippet in a movie or randomly on a playlist and you havent heard it in 2 years you think to yourself "hey, this is awesome". Then you whip out the album and play it and youre good for another 2 years until it pops up randomly again.
This is cool but it is also something I wouldnt want to listen to on repeat.

Just not something I see myself coming back to

Not my cup of tea. You can't understand a single lyric

I enjoyed this. But there are a few songs that just sap the energy out of the album.

I really like this era of noise rock but there’s so many better examples than this

I hated this. The songs were boring and all sounded the same. There were no dynamics, it was just the same thing the whole time. I don’t like the vocalist, his voice irked me. There is nothing redeeming about this album for me.

This is yet another one of those albums that you apparently have to have discovered at the time of its release for it to make any sort of impact. As part of the 1001 Albums Challenge, "Venus Luxure No. 1" Baby by Girls Against Boys (a strange band name, given that there isn't a single woman in the band) leaves me with no lasting impression. All I hear are typical indie rock harmonies on the aggressive side and simple song structures with sombre vocals. It's a bit like The Fall or early Cure, but in a particularly bad mood, with a sound that's generally more US-American. That don't impress me much, and by the second track, I'm already bored. With all due respect, this isn't a musical milestone, and I don't need to waste my time on this kind of strumming. It's not as bad as other stuff from that era, but it's not really exciting either.

Venus Luxure No. 1 Baby by Girls Against Boys is, approximately noise rock. And it is a great noise rock record, but it's presence here raises more questions than it provides answers. But before I get into that, I do want to talk about this record, and give Girls Against Boys their dues, because they do deserve it. At the end of the day, this is a really excellent noise rock record. It's somewhat mixed in with post hardcore and alternative, but I'd say it still reads pretty squarely as noise rock, even if it's a relatively tame version of the genre compared to what a lot of bands were doing. There are great songs here behind the noise and the grinding, which is essential to a good noise rock record. And this record also includes Bullet Proof Cupid, which is Girls against Boys' most lasting contribution to the genre, in fact, while digging around the genre, I had actually heard the song prior to this. It's one of the best tunes here, with kind of a weird morphing groove, cool vocal effects, and a searing tone. Since Girls Against Boys never get *that* loud, I think most of their highlights are the tensest, most anxious, most tightly coiled moments, like Rockets Are Red, Satin Down, and Bughouse. But I pretty much rocked hard to this the whole way, just because we are operating squarely in my domain on this one. But it's also a situation where this is pretty solidly for aficionados of the genre. In short, this isn't going to convert you if you aren't already blasting noise in your free time. Which is what gets us to some of my confusion. This is a great record, but it isn't really hailed as a highwater mark for the genre. Maybe it's here due to the crossover appeal, but it still highlights a weird gap regardless. Dimery has a great selection of '60s and '70s proto noise rock/genre adjacent stuff, the genre's 80's essentials, and some cool, relatively off the wall picks for the 2000s. But he has *very* little from the '90s, which doesn't have substantial crossover appeal. This is especially odd since, for noise rock, the '90s are largely considered one of the genre's most fruitful decades, damn near full stop. I can't fathom how one can write a list like this, and include Girls Against Boys without including a single album from The Jesus Lizard, Shellac, Melvins, Cows, Chreubs, Oxbow, Brainiac, Cop Shoot Cop, U.S. Maple, or any number of other bands with albums which are more highly acclaimed, more beloved among fans, more representative of the genre, more singular or more influential. But I don't want this to reflect badly on Girls Against Boys. Noise Rock is a small enough genre without punching down on bands for no good reason. And Venus Luxure No. 1 Baby is an album I *thoroughly* enjoyed, whether or not it makes much sense on the list.

Die 90s zurückbringen ist ein Fehler

Not bad, but not great. This album had a lot of good qualities but just wasn't the most interesting.

It's not bad. I quite like this style of music, but I think there are better bands out there in this genre. Each track to the next was a bit hit and miss. Don't get why it's on the list but eh.

I've already forgotten this album and I've not even finished it yet

Better than Coldplay

Good production but the vocals and instrumental performances are mediocre at best. Babes in Toyland are better

Just noise.

I’m way up on this compared to everyone else. Even though I’m not blown away by it, this is the kind of thing I love about the project. A band I’d genuinely heard nothing about, delivering some great, bad-ass tracks. It’s especially fun when you come in expecting something utterly shit (based on the reviews) and you have that moment of… “wait… do I like this?” And you’re always expecting it to turn, but it didn't.

I swear I know nothing about genres. A lot of other ‘post hardcore’ bands I’ve rated on here I’ve absolutely hated, but this lands for me. I’m nodding and tapping right along with it. I love the layered, gloomy guitars. The dirty, vibey riffs. The propulsive drums. The vocal embellishments. The energy.

There’s a few dreary, bleh kind of tracks, but 70-80% of this I’m super into.

3.5 rounded up.

This isn't the most unpleasant listening experience I've had, but there's absolutely zero creative spark in it. Why's it here?

This has some Sonic Youth vibes. And I don’t care much for Sonic Youth.

The most discouraging this about this project is the constant stream of 60s/70s guitar rock. But the *second* most discouraging thing is how many albums are just dead mediocre.