Reviews by therealab

Not available on Spotify is not a good sign. This sucks. Dance music is bad. Maybe I don't really like music. Oh my god this is bad. Dance music with found sound?!? How have I never heard this before? Not available on Spotify because they couldn't obtain appropriate permissions from all the sampling. Good work, Coldcut. Not only does your music suck, but you stole it from other, more deserving, artists. Lisa Stansfield must have been one of these guys' girlfriend. The Jetsons was a knock off future Flintstones. My son makes better music in Garage Band. Queen Latifah was never one of my favorites and that's no different here. Stealing Eric B. & Rakim's Paid in Full beat and music and passing it off as a "new" song is insane. I am super glad this doesn't have permission to be on Spotify. The US release I found on YouTube is longer than the original by three songs.

I love Johnny Cash. I Walk The Line...a hit with audiences, both incarcerated and otherwise. There's something about him that just fits in these recordings. A Boy Named Sue, the greatest song ever written by Shel Silverstein. (There'll Be) Peace in the Valley is amazing. It's not as good as the show at Folsom, but it's good.

Nothing like some chit chat before the music starts. This feels like an album that's going to be full of these Odd Future guys being....odd in brief interludes and some found sound. Frank Ocean is the D'Angelo of Alternative R&B. I bet Frank Ocean must idolize Stevie Wonder. More talking. And I bet Steve Lacy idolizes Frank Ocean. The difference between the style and the content of Crack Rock is about as disparate as two things can get. His voice and Musiq Soulchild's are virtually indistinguishable. Pink Matter is amazing. I love Andre 3000.

Every techno album is an hour long. It's too much techno! And it starts with a really stupid interview about New York. DJs love random street interview chatter. Every song with this shit! This is going to be a long hour. This is nonsense...just get someone to write some lyrics and hire someone to sing if you need this many words on your songs. This is one of the worst techno albums I've ever heard...I'm sure it's supposed to represent the vibrant city life of New York or some other overblown critical nonsense words. This guy was a decade early to get the Mad Men theme. This is the album begat RJD2, especially Rodney Yates.

The title track eats up the time and the weight of this album. It is also a massively overrated song that has had too much analysis dedicated to it based on a bunch of stupid, ham-fisted references. I can't imagine what Don McLean's life must have been like after American Pie. It has over a billion streams on Spotify. I'm not hating Till Tomorrow, standard 70s folk ballad. The whole album feels very non-descript...except for the one exception. Maybe a little on the treacly side of folk though. Everybody Loves Me, Baby is more in the style of American Pie so maybe it wasn't a fortunate accident for him. I like Rodriguez better than this.

Not available on Spotify is maybe THE key red flag that an album is getting a 1 star review. A German woman singing English showtunes...SIGN ME UP!!! I'm suffering through this to finish this project. This is one of the worst albums on the list. These songs would be bad in a musical, forget about in album format. I'm having a hard time concentrating on anything but how awful this is. Taika Waititi heard Song of a German Mother and then we got Jojo Rabbit...not a terrible outcome. First 25 minute YouTube video down. If someone told me this was the soundtrack from Cabaret I would believe it without question. I tried to piece this together from various YouTube videos and ended up listening to a bunch of extraneous (I think) songs.

I only know these guys from Dreadlock Holiday, another British band that loves ska/reggae, on the Snatch Soundtrack. The Wall Street Shuffle isn't doing it for me...another band that hates capitalism. The laser sounds are a great addition. And they hate Americans too, this is tremendous. They're like terrible prog rock Harry Nilsson. Add prog rock to the "I know this is going to suck just by the genre" list. Baron Samedi is like a Santana cover. There's a Mothers of Invention vibe to this album...and the comparison is not flattering to 10cc. I'd rather listen to Dreadlock Holiday on repeat for eternity than this album.

Sweet holy Jesus this sucks. It's not a good start when the artist keeps herself unavailable on Spotify as a protest. I'm guessing it plays really well with music critics though, the kinds of people who demand you spend $400 on over ear headphones because earbuds, while more functional, distort the intent of the artist. Only a rich white woman married to a rich white comedian could be such an asshole, easy to protest everyone else's working conditions when you have more money than you'll ever need through your husband. This is like if Regina Spektor and Tori Amos had a baby with Bjork and Are Brun and was terrible. Her weird vocals are beyond me, she's from California...why is she affecting Bjork's accent? Five songs on a 55 minute album is unconscionable. I guess getting another terrible album out of the way is a plus. I guess Andy Samberg's goofiness balances her self-important pretentiousness. This isn't in the 10,001 albums you need to hear before you die, every one of the ladies I mentioned above are better than this. Monkey & Bear is better than Emily I guess. Every song on this album sounds identical.

Everything this guy does sounds like Toy Story now. This is the album that saved Brian Wilson's life, so it can't be all bad. I can't get away from the goofiness of his lyrics, I guess that kind of hit you over the head storytelling works for some people as a break from all the symbolism and "does it really mean anything" lyrics from someone like Dylan, but it just comes across as a joke to me. It is actually amazing that Disney never had him do a soundtrack until Toy Story. And then he did half of them for the next two decades. Burn On is a funny song about Cleveland, those poor water burning bastards. Dayton, Ohio - 1903 feels like an admission. His version of You Can Leave Your Hat On isn't the best, I like Joe Cocker's and Tom Jones' better, but he wrote and and it is a great song.

Multiple Smashing Pumpkins albums means there are too many Smashing Pumpkins albums on the list. Frankly, one is too many. Maybe I like this album? Billy Corgan's whiny voice still irritates the hell out of me. There they are! Back to being a band I hate. Zero is terrible. Bullet With Butterfly Wings is one of the most overrated songs ever. His voice is inescapable. I bet Creed loves these guys. The less "rock" songs are generally better. I think I just don't like 90s rock. And maybe that's a hangover from living through it and being more into hip hop then. This album is better than Siamese Dream and not as bad as I thought going into it.

Four notes in and I know this sucks. This is like the worst of 80s music and electronica at the same time. Maybe that's the appeal for some Millennial music critic with, like LCD Soundsystem said, nostalgia for the unremembered 80s. Add synth pop to the list of genres that as soon as I see the label, I know it's going to be a long listen. Why are all these electronic albums so long? I have no words for how awful this is. Disco II Disco is one of the most annoying songs I have ever heard. I guess I have some words. Mdc vendredi could just be warmed over Grandmaster Flash. Nope, it gets so much worse so quickly. This is like the music they use to program people in cults or to torture inmates in contravention of the laws of war...and people listen to this voluntarily. It really makes you realize how truly awesome drugs are. No shitty album would be complete without some fake found sound. This was not good. I guess Damaged people is the highlight? That's not saying much though.

A double album of drum and bass music...I'm five seconds in and can't stand it. It combines techno and British rappers? How could I not go for it? First impressions: this is going to be a looooong 1 star album. 23 songs and they are all super long. Over two hours of this? I'm ready to quit over this specific album at this point. There are ups and downs on this, and Digital is a down. The good news is that it is only 9 minutes long. The repetitiveness of this is mind numbing...which is interesting because I can only imagine listening to this when you're already high off your ass. Found sound! It feels like I've been listening to this for a week. I have listened to over an hour of this and have over an hour left...I am not sure I have the stamina for this. This is the alternate title music for Mad Men. RJD2 loves these guys. I am almost done with the first album...even if this was the end it would be awful, the fact that I have another hour is pushing this further and further down the list.

I don't dislike it. They fill the same niche that Alabama Shakes do...and I like the Shakes a lot more. I like this album more than Desperate Youth, Blood Thirsty Babes. The affected voice of the lead singer is annoying me now. It's too much on some of the songs. I am nitpicking now, I like this album. Lover's Day reminds me of Neil Diamond's Coming to America. I like this album...TV On The Radio is one of the bands I've discovered in this project that I like.

So many albums before I got one by Kraftwerk...now it feels like every other album is by them. The 70s musical robot voice ranks behind Frampton, Daft Punk and Roger Troutman. I bet Vangelis loves these guys. Of course they had a collaborative album in the late 80s. There are not words for how dumb this music is. The length of the songs basically goes down as the album goes on which is good when you realize you still have 6 songs to go off an 8 song album. It's Planet Rock! I hate that song too. Name drop some famous people, that's a neat trick. Metal on Metal is Trent Reznor's favorite song, dark, synthesizers, metal on metal noises. Abzug brings the Planet Rock melody from the title track back. I bet Madonna was listening to this song exclusively when she did the song Music. This album uses the phrase "Trans-Europe Express" too many times. It makes PM Dawn's Paper Dolls seem like an exercise in restraint by comparison. This was better than The Man Machine.

Afrofrench music?!? Sign me up! You realize how awesome Fela Kuti is when listening to this. Broken glass and engine revving...might be my favorite part of the album so far. Ladysmith Black Mombazo must hate this guy, he basically stole their act and translated it to French...I'm not sure which is more offensive. The album cover looks like he printed it on his dad's inkjet printer and then sold it in front of the mall from his car trunk. I can't tell the difference between any of these songs. All of them sound like they want to be Paul Simon's Graceland though. Dit Jeannot is the best song on the album. I just don't get World music.

I don't like electronic music that much, but these guys always struck a chord with me. A lot of long songs on this album, not a good sign. This feels like the spiritual successor to Blondie in some ways. Get Innocuous! is a good start although I hate titles with punctuation in them. I have always liked the lyrics, there's a combination or earnestness and silliness that's appealing. North American Scum is a perfect example. Someone Great is their best song, not just on this album, but in their repertoire. It's crazy to think they made a great dance song about losing someone. The driving piano on All My Friends should be annoying but it works perfectly. I really like this album. Title track is the first real miss. The lyrics remind me of the Tiny Rick episode of Rick and Morty. New York I Love You is a bit of a downer and a major tonal shift. I'm not sure how I feel about it.

Make my funk the P-Funk too! I also want to get funked up! Dr. Dre owes these guys his post-NWA career. This is a good listen. And in the Parliament vs. Funkadelic debate, I like this better than One Nation Under a Groove so far. Give Up The Funk (Tear The Roof Off The Sucker) is tremendous. Night Of the Thumpasorus Peoples is silly, but I like the groove.

So far so good. I bet Tracy Chapman gets compared to her endlessly. The first song is the best song. It hasn't gotten bad, but there was promise there that has dissipated over the next three songs. I like the fusion of soul/funk/R&B. Join The Boys is like lady Isaac Hayes. Like Fire is a highlight too. She's got a Bonnie Raitt feel to her on occasion.

Much poppier than Live Through This...maybe Courtney was feeling happier after getting away with murder? Kidding. She clearly just liked money. Hole and Liz Phair both went pop after their big breakthroughs. I like this album better. Malibu is good. You forget how good Courtney Love was based on how she is now. I'm really liking this, outside the singles this is a really tight album. It all sounds like Hole without sounding exactly the same. I am loving this album. I did not give Hole their due when they were popular. Great album, this was a surprise.

I'll give them credit, I might like them the best out of all the New Wave bands I've ever heard. Or maybe that's damning them with faint praise? I am glad this is a short album. Villiers Terrace is just a super repetitive annoyance. If I've said it once, I've said it 1,001 times because that's how many New Wave albums are apparently on this list, New Wave sucks.